Color of Pain
by Raphaella Trevane
Summary: pain equals black and they have alot of it. number IX/OC


I have a way of writing stories and I can tell this way is a lot worse than the way I write my poems. That's what I believe. Since Ari's not a real character Namine's the closest I can get to her.

* * *

_You always use black when you draw. Why is that?_

_It resembles pain to me._

Ari drew a picture of a black cat dieing peacefully. What she always wanted to do was to die. But of course for her that would never happen. There was nothing she could do to ease her pain. Slitting her wrists didn't help that much. It just wasn't painful enough to cancel the other pain out.

Tear drops fell onto her painting ruining the cat picture. The blood blended with the black. Red will be her tears and black will be her pain. Those two went well together. No one could change those colors because those were the colors that resided within her.

Blood tears meant that no one could ever love her. Black pain meant that no one could ever ease her pain. It was as simple as that. She would continue on living with no one to ever love her.

She wiped her tears away and stared at her picture. She wondered why she could draw death but she could never feel it. This was her only wish. It's the only one she ever wanted. Sure she was talented and beautiful but no one ever wanted to love for who she really was. But yet again, who could ever love wolf?

_I thought black resembled death._

_It actually doesn't. Well, in my opinion. Like if your drowning in someone's pain wouldn't it seem black to you?_

_I don't really know. You look at things a different way._

"Can you draw something for me?" He asked.

"What do you want? An animal dieing or a person dieing?" She asked.

"No. Draw me a dragon."

"Dead or Alive?"

"Alive, of course. When will you be done?"

"Come back in three hours."

He nodded and left the room.

How exactly do you draw a dragon that's alive and breathing? Ari thought. Well, it shouldn't be too hard. How do you draw one that's not bleeding to death? I shouldn't be having trouble this but it's not like every day I'm asked to draw something that's alive.

He resembled alot like a dragon. Not an alive one but also not a dead one.

So it was like in betweeen. A dragon that's alive but looks dead.

She started with the dragon's face. It was looking away. Like the way he looked away whenever he was talking to people. Then the body filled with scars and wounds.

Then the arms wrapped in bandages to cover the wounds. Then the legs with scars all over and no bandages to cover them. Then the wings black like the darkness with bandages to cover most of one wing.

She was almost done with the drawing. She drew a full moon in the top right hand corner.

She looked at the drawing. Maybe she should add a wolf or a cat or a fox. Which one would work? A wolf would work.

She sketched a side view of a wolf laying down. That seemed to work really well.

"Are you done with the drawing?" He said.

Ari nodded her head and handed it to him. "It's what you wanted."

"This isn't what I expected."

"You asked for an alive dragon and that's what you get. Do you not like it?"

"It's not that it's just..." Maybe he should of asked Namine to draw him something. He didn't really understand why she drew a dragon like this. It was dead yet it was alive at the same time. Then he realized it described him and she was trying to tell them that she went through the same things as he did. And that he wasn't the only one in pain.

"Thank you, Ari. It's what I wanted."

She smiled at him and started on a new drawing. He left the room and felt the blood red tears flow down his face.

"No, Dragoon. Thank you." She etched those words in her heart. And she would never forget him no matter what.

Maybe someday they would become more than friends.

* * *

It sounds kinda redundant to me and subtle too. I got to stop writing like this. Anyways at least it's out of my mind partially. I don't really understand why I wrote this. If it doesn't make any sense then don't review and keep it to yourself because I most likely won't be able to explain this. I don't think the ending makes sense well anyways at least it's out partially. There's more to come though not from this but from other ideas I have and they're like bothering me like crazy. This story bothers me too and I don't know why I wrote it. I could of stopped myself but no I didn't. And I'm acting really paranoid right now. I'm done now. 


End file.
